Who Gives A Fuck


Hi reader. What did you do today. Wait, I’ll go first. It’s Saturday night and I’m writing this on the airport express line that goes into Seoul. A flight from New York just landed and the train is packed. There’s some college girls with pigtails and roller suitcases talking about changing their majors. I’m suited up like Gordon Motherfucking Gekko but I’m sober and therefore too terrified to just go talk to them. So instead I’m trying to impress them by pretending I can read the Korean on the subway map. But I can’t read it because I’m a white imperialist and so I’m exempt; fuck it. Babies born on the day I got here in March 2014 can already read more than I can, probably.


Good Friday night. My social circle has finally reached the size where I have to lie to some people so I can hang out with others. Had a nice shot of schadenfreude as a buddy who’d been sober for two months fell off the wagon. What a cunty thing to say.

Also today I read The Sun Also Rises and feel stupid for being 90 years late to the Hemingway party. Why didn’t you tell me that this guy was any good.

In Seoul this afternoon I played Monopoly in a cafe and won pretty hard. Probably because I’m dressed like a banker. Then outside I got shoved by a man who came up and said he didn’t like foreigners. What a brazen move. Say what you will about racists but they have confidence that the rest of us can only fantasize about.


I’m only posting this trivial shit because I’ve written something on the blog every day for like two weeks. If I break the streak then I fail forever and have let everyone down and the demons of doubt will be proven right.

Also if you’re one of those people who happens to give a fuck about my blog (see rhetorical question in post title, above) then check back tomorrow for an announcement of sorts.

All right. Colton out.

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Author: Fred Colton

Fred is just another guy online.

11 thoughts on “Who Gives A Fuck”

  1. I don’t actually give a fuck about your blog, but it appears in my inbox cause I subscribed to it a while ago and figure I might as well read it. I’m too lazy to unsubscribe. Keep the streak alive though. You’ve given me a streak to live for. Thanks!!

      1. No problem kind Sir. My fucks, in my current state, aren’t so brightly shining and are withering on the vine seemingly invested nowhere. How could it be otherwise? Thanks to your blog for sparking the meekest glimmer of the reverse, which is a step in a directionless world of my own creation.

      2. Of course now I feel bad about my attempt at harsh humor. Truthfully, I was attempting to match your tone with my comment about ‘not giving a fuck’. To me your tone seems to be ‘hard-ass’, on the edge of blue-collar, and in your face with peppering curse words through out your writing. No problem..anyway…just thought I’d reverse it and toss it back at ya, but I think I missed the humor mark. Oh well…

  2. I’ve packed the “Snows of Kilimanjaro” for my train journey. Trouble with the old fucker is, if you read him too much and go beyond the ‘changes your writing’ phase, he’ll make sure you think anything you write is utter shit.

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