Today I flipped over a desk at work and if you’ve never done so, then do so, it’s therapeutic. It’s Christmas Eve and I’m at middle school. Annual tests have concluded and there’s no reason for any of us to be here except for the fact that Koreans are addicted to work. I told the kids that we could watch Christmas with Mr. Bean if we played a vocabulary game first. So get out some paper. This quartet of girls didn’t take out paper. I did a lap around the room; still no paper. Over went the desk. A big blast and then a sweet void of silence settling over the room. They got out paper.
And I’m the good guy. Other teachers put kids in headlocks and pull their hair. Carry around wooden switches to crack their wrists. Peg the mobile ones with basketballs and knock them sideways into the bleachers. And you can’t really disapprove of it, because it gets results and results are rare with children. Respect thrives here. You just need shock and awe. Most people think brutal dictators are evil. I think they’re just former teachers. I too would have blown up Alderaan.