Not Sure What To Make Of This One

I remember feeling proud of myself today for not knowing who had been nominated for the Oscars. I then remembered that I hate people who brag about not knowing popular things.

I went to the café and the staff stood up when I walked in like I was the President. I remember this really annoyed me but I’m not sure why.

I keep forgetting people’s names when I go out.

I need to try some new hobbies because maybe there is something out there that I haven’t tried yet that I’m naturally good at.

I mean, probably not but hey.

I have a Rain Man-ish affinity for dates and so I remember this day in 2004 I was in London with my grandparents. I had never been abroad before. I was so excited I was having trouble breathing. I thought that this girl Allison from school was going to like me a lot because I’d been to a foreign country but then I went back to America and she didn’t give a shit.

I’m in Asia now and I haven’t been home in two years.

I was on the motorcycle today and finally felt at peace in the anarchy of traffic, in this seething hardscrabble doomscape where people crash and get hit all the time. I can make time slow down and I can find the gaps and I can predict when someone else is about to do something stupid.

I got to work and took off my motorcycle helmet, which is a helmet that I think looks cool, like something Daft Punk would rock, and one of my students walked by and said it looked like a rice cooker.

I don’t know about this writing thing, or about this reading thing either. I have been reading the same book for like 3 months now and I’m only 40% through. I might not ever read another book. I might be reading this book forever. I might be doing everything that I’m doing now forever.

I need a haircut.

Advertisements

At Ease

I have accepted that I’m just a guy. Just an average male with a standard-issue mental hard drive. By now I know that no matter how many influences I shotgun into my head, I’m not going to wake up a genius one day. I can do away with the fury of trying. I feel pretty good about that.